This is a loaded question. I am afraid of so many things I cannot even name. I suppose I'll start with the ones I can name... and see what comes to me?
1) The Dark. This is always the first one that comes to mind. Maybe it's my past experiences in the dark that cause this... maybe it's the scary movies I enjoy... maybe it's the noises that happen only when it's dark... I don't know. However, I hate hate hate hate hate being alone in the dark. I start to hear things. I start to see things.
2) Loneliness. This maybe coincides with #1. It could also be taken to have many deep meanings. I'm afraid of feeling loneliness, but not of being alone (in the light). I enjoy spending time alone and actually need it a little each day, but the feeling of wanting to be with people and not having anyone to be with is frightening to me.
3) God. Maybe it's cliché, but it's true.
Proverbs 1:7 - The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.
Ecclesiastes 12:13 - Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind.
Deuteronomy 10:12 - And now, Israel, what does the Lord your God ask of you but to fear the Lord your God, to walk in obedience to him, to love him, to serve the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul...
4) Being broke. I was there. I was at the end of my financial rope, in the bottom of the pit and trying to dig my way out. I absolutely never ever ever want to be back there. I pulled myself out and I will continue to stay above that line. No matter what it takes. My budget sheet and plan has been flawless, as long as I stick to it. The problem of sticking to it is pretty much handled by the fear listed above.
Monday, October 6, 2014
Sunday, September 7, 2014
Hunger Action Month - Day 7 - From the Scripture
Today, first let me say that anyone can feed the hungry. Your faith, your background, your gender, your sexual identity, your race, your age, your socioeconomic background... none of those things hinder you from being called to feed the hungry. It's not a Christian/Muslim/Hindu/Jewish/Buddhist/etc problem. It's not an un/educated problem. It's not a male/female problem. It's not a gay/bisexual/transgender/straight problem. It's not a white/black/brown/yellow/green problem. It's not a young/old problem. It's not a poor/wealthy problem. This is a worldwide problem that we absolutely have the ability to transform and we are all a part of this world.
For me, my faith was the first thing to convict me to feed the hungry. I simply cannot call myself a Christian or claim to be a follower of Christ if I do not care for those who are hungry, thirsty, naked, homeless or oppressed. That is my interpretation of my faith, my calling. So, from where do I make these conclusions? Scripture.
First, if I am made in the Lord's image, to do His will, I take special notice in the nature of God's character.
Psalm 146:6-8 - He is the Maker of heaven and earth, the sea, and everything in them—
he remains faithful forever.
He upholds the cause of the oppressed and gives food to the hungry.
The Lord sets prisoners free,
the Lord gives sight to the blind, the Lord lifts up those who are bowed down,
the Lord loves the righteous.
There are demands for the care of those who are hungry in Proverbs. Proverbs 25:21 - If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.
The prophet Isaiah gives us an example of fasting for the Lord.
Isaiah 58:6-7 - “Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke?
Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter - when you see the naked, to clothe them, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
And also gives the Lord's reply to such fasting: Isaiah 58:9b-11 - “If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday.
The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.
And probably the most powerful scripture on hunger is when Jesus is sharing about the separation of sheep (those who knew Him) from goats (those whom He did not know). It pretty much speaks for itself, but our Lord and Savior, Jesus, is putting Himself into the flesh and likeness of those worth nothing to society.
Matthew 25:31-46 - “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.
“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’
“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’
“The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’
“Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’
“They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’
“He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’
“Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”
"whatever you did for the least of these..., you did for me."
#HungerActionMonth
For me, my faith was the first thing to convict me to feed the hungry. I simply cannot call myself a Christian or claim to be a follower of Christ if I do not care for those who are hungry, thirsty, naked, homeless or oppressed. That is my interpretation of my faith, my calling. So, from where do I make these conclusions? Scripture.
First, if I am made in the Lord's image, to do His will, I take special notice in the nature of God's character.
Psalm 146:6-8 - He is the Maker of heaven and earth, the sea, and everything in them—
he remains faithful forever.
He upholds the cause of the oppressed and gives food to the hungry.
The Lord sets prisoners free,
the Lord gives sight to the blind, the Lord lifts up those who are bowed down,
the Lord loves the righteous.
There are demands for the care of those who are hungry in Proverbs. Proverbs 25:21 - If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.
The prophet Isaiah gives us an example of fasting for the Lord.
Isaiah 58:6-7 - “Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke?
Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter - when you see the naked, to clothe them, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
And also gives the Lord's reply to such fasting: Isaiah 58:9b-11 - “If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday.
The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.
And probably the most powerful scripture on hunger is when Jesus is sharing about the separation of sheep (those who knew Him) from goats (those whom He did not know). It pretty much speaks for itself, but our Lord and Savior, Jesus, is putting Himself into the flesh and likeness of those worth nothing to society.
Matthew 25:31-46 - “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.
“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’
“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’
“The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’
“Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’
“They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’
“He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’
“Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”
"whatever you did for the least of these..., you did for me."
#HungerActionMonth
Saturday, September 6, 2014
Hunger Action Month - Days 4, 5, 6 - Working Together
#HungerActionMonth - I missed a couple days, so I want to post about three organizations I believe are fighting the good fight against hunger. All of these programs supply food for food pantries and soup kitchens.
Feeding America - feedingamerica.org - This is a national organization with foodbanks in almost all metropolitan areas including both NYC and Grand Rapids, MI. It provides low-cost or free goods to participating soup kitchens and food pantries.
City Harvest - c...ityharvest.org - This is a local NYC organization that collects 50 million pounds annually of produce and good food from restaurants, grocers, farms, and manufacturers, which would otherwise go to waste. They provide us with everything from carrots and frozen pizzas to coffee creamer and pretzels, all for free.
Rock and Wrap It Up - rockandwrapitup.org - This is also a local NYC organization. It collects leftover food from concerts, shows, movie and television productions and more, and then redistributes to soup kitchens for use in their programs. We've received trays of food from productions like Law and Order:SVU, Gotham, Boardwalk Empire and several movies - all for free and all delicious, catered food.
So, for many of us, yesterday was payday? Want an easy way to participate in #HungerActionMonth? Go to one of the above websites and throw in $10. It's not much, no, but it probably won't hurt your budget much and for these organization, $10 can go a long way. City Harvest even claims to be able to provide 40 New Yorkers with food for only $10. Hot diggity dog, that's $0.40/person. Not a bad deal, right?
Feeding America - feedingamerica.org - This is a national organization with foodbanks in almost all metropolitan areas including both NYC and Grand Rapids, MI. It provides low-cost or free goods to participating soup kitchens and food pantries.
City Harvest - c...ityharvest.org - This is a local NYC organization that collects 50 million pounds annually of produce and good food from restaurants, grocers, farms, and manufacturers, which would otherwise go to waste. They provide us with everything from carrots and frozen pizzas to coffee creamer and pretzels, all for free.
Rock and Wrap It Up - rockandwrapitup.org - This is also a local NYC organization. It collects leftover food from concerts, shows, movie and television productions and more, and then redistributes to soup kitchens for use in their programs. We've received trays of food from productions like Law and Order:SVU, Gotham, Boardwalk Empire and several movies - all for free and all delicious, catered food.
So, for many of us, yesterday was payday? Want an easy way to participate in #HungerActionMonth? Go to one of the above websites and throw in $10. It's not much, no, but it probably won't hurt your budget much and for these organization, $10 can go a long way. City Harvest even claims to be able to provide 40 New Yorkers with food for only $10. Hot diggity dog, that's $0.40/person. Not a bad deal, right?
Hunger Action Month - Day 3 - Serving
I have to admit something to all of you: my favorite part of living with my partner is that I get to cook for him. Tonight's menu is turkey burgers, corn on the cob, and crispy potatoes. So good. I can't wait to serve it to him when he gets home.
What about you? Do you like cooking? Do you like serving people in larger groups? Our program serves groups of 15, 30, 50 and 150... all through the skill and will of volunteers. If you like to cook, chop vegetables, serve oth...ers, even clean up, consider spending a few hours at your local soup kitchen. Even the smallest of towns has at least one - it may be a prayer breakfast for teens, an afterschool dinner program for kids, once week at a local church or a full on meal served at noon every single day. Give a few hours a day, a week, a month... it will make a difference and you'll be participating in #HungerActionMonth
What about you? Do you like cooking? Do you like serving people in larger groups? Our program serves groups of 15, 30, 50 and 150... all through the skill and will of volunteers. If you like to cook, chop vegetables, serve oth...ers, even clean up, consider spending a few hours at your local soup kitchen. Even the smallest of towns has at least one - it may be a prayer breakfast for teens, an afterschool dinner program for kids, once week at a local church or a full on meal served at noon every single day. Give a few hours a day, a week, a month... it will make a difference and you'll be participating in #HungerActionMonth
Hunger Action Month - Day 2 - Clean Out Your Freezer
Did you know that food pantries, while preferring non-perishables, will also accept frozen foods? Many have at least one freezer and at least one fridge available for food. So, take a look at your freezer. Check out the content - please don't donate if it's freezer burned. But do you really need 10 packages of frozen spinach when you haven't cooked even 1 since February? I'm going to guess that answer is "no." It was just on a good sale and you w...ere TRYING to eat healthy. I get it. However, someone else may really benefit from it. It's not trash, it's just allowing food to get used instead of buried by ice build-up.
Or remember those soups that kids sold as a fundraiser? Yeah, CHAOS kids sold them every year. And you bought them every year because golly gee, they looked and sounded delicious on paper. And then they arrived and you were never really in the mood for soup. Guess what? Those soups are great meals for our homeless populations living in hotels or on the streets. They can be heated in a microwave without many utensils (can opener, pot/pan, etc)! I know that if our pantry got a huge donation of them, our clients would be ecstatic!
Clean out your freezer today and participate in #HungerActionMonth.
Or remember those soups that kids sold as a fundraiser? Yeah, CHAOS kids sold them every year. And you bought them every year because golly gee, they looked and sounded delicious on paper. And then they arrived and you were never really in the mood for soup. Guess what? Those soups are great meals for our homeless populations living in hotels or on the streets. They can be heated in a microwave without many utensils (can opener, pot/pan, etc)! I know that if our pantry got a huge donation of them, our clients would be ecstatic!
Clean out your freezer today and participate in #HungerActionMonth.
Hunger Action Month - Day 1
For the next month, I have committed to posting on Facebook about Hunger Action Month. I want to also share these posts here for those who may not have Facebook or may have missed the posts. I have some catching up to do, so I hope you won't mind multiple posts in one day, but here you go!
September is Hunger Action Month. Each day this month, I'm going to post about hunger and issues surrounding it. Not only because it's my current career, but also because it's a basic human right to have access to food.
Today, I ate. I had cereal for breakfast. Not a name brand, but similar to honey nut cheerios and cold milk. I had Doritos topped with shredded mozzarella cheese melted in the microwave. My boyfriend and I went out for froyo. We made a delicious dinner ...of marinated chicken breast and carmelized broccoli.
Every day, my program feeds people who simply don't have access to anything I ate today. We only give out UHT milk (shelf-stable), never chips, never cheese, never chicken breast (unless donated) and broccoli? Yeah right. Forget the marinades, the oils, the salt... and in a city in which 1.4 million people RELY on food pantries and soup kitchens, i cannot imagine not having access to the food I ate today. Can you?
Can I challenge you? Take a look at your pantries. Think about something you think would be a treat for people in hard times - oil, flour, seasonings, frozen meats, minute rice, good cold and hot cereals, etc. Next time you purchase it, purchase an extra to donate to your local food pantry. It could be something as simple as a head of broccoli, but it could make someone's day.
September is Hunger Action Month. Each day this month, I'm going to post about hunger and issues surrounding it. Not only because it's my current career, but also because it's a basic human right to have access to food.
Today, I ate. I had cereal for breakfast. Not a name brand, but similar to honey nut cheerios and cold milk. I had Doritos topped with shredded mozzarella cheese melted in the microwave. My boyfriend and I went out for froyo. We made a delicious dinner ...of marinated chicken breast and carmelized broccoli.
Every day, my program feeds people who simply don't have access to anything I ate today. We only give out UHT milk (shelf-stable), never chips, never cheese, never chicken breast (unless donated) and broccoli? Yeah right. Forget the marinades, the oils, the salt... and in a city in which 1.4 million people RELY on food pantries and soup kitchens, i cannot imagine not having access to the food I ate today. Can you?
Can I challenge you? Take a look at your pantries. Think about something you think would be a treat for people in hard times - oil, flour, seasonings, frozen meats, minute rice, good cold and hot cereals, etc. Next time you purchase it, purchase an extra to donate to your local food pantry. It could be something as simple as a head of broccoli, but it could make someone's day.
Sunday, August 17, 2014
Why Do I Blog?
I haven't really updated this thing with any regularity. I would apologize, although I feel as though I don't really need to do so. It's random and it's scattered. It's not that I've lost interest, I just haven't been using my spare time to do anything productive, like blogging. It comes down to Words With Friends or Blog? Or it comes down to Netflix or Blog?
Lately it's been - ugh. I've been running around all day for work, so when I get home, the last thing I want to do is be productive. Honestly, I haven't even called my mother in like, a week. That's huge since I used to talk to her at LEAST every other day.
What's new, you ask? Well, how about everything?
I moved on July 1st. My boyfriend, the love of my life, moved from Michigan to NYC to be with me and not only did the distance end... the horrible 800 miles that separated us for over a year... but we did something crazy: we decided to live together. (I'll blog about that at another time).
I started a second job. It's a part-time position within Project Hospitality (the agency for which I already hold a position) working in a shelter. Every Saturday and Sunday, I somehow manage to pull myself out of bed at 6a in order to clock in at 7a for an 8 hour shift of site babysitting and story-making. It's not a bad job (actually, it's really simple), but it helps to pay some bills until E finds himself a job.
Tinka is here. I forgot what it's like to try to roll over in bed with a cat on my feet. Or to wear my favorite black shirt or skirt or pants or dress with cat hair decorations. Or to walk to the kitchen for a glass of water and step in puke. I also forgot how nice it was just to lay on the couch with her watching TV on my lap with me... or the feeling of coming home to someone if no human is home.
We have a bathtub, a real kitchen with counters, a living room with windows and a bedroom with two closets. We pretty much live in a palace. Pad status = increased 10 fold. Windows - these are probably my favorite parts of the new place. They lead to fresh air, to breezes, to smells of summer... they are where I most often find Tinka perched and from where I can watch the people of our block like a creeper. So good.
E is unemployed. This. This has been the hardest part of all of this. We, hopefully, will be so much happier and healthier when this phase of our relationship is over. We're not really in a horrible place, there's just much depression, much anger, much stress, much worry, much negativity surrounding it. I cannot wait for this period of waiting and hoping to be fruitful. God is providing and God will provide, but there have definitely been moments where I wondered if we hadn't made the wrong decisions in all of this because there has been little blessing on that front. (again, I'll blog about this at another time, I think).
However, despite all the news and things that kept me away, I'm back. Every Sunday at the shelter, I work the downstairs office, which is composed of a camera monitor system, a phone and a computer from 1782 that runs slower than molasses in winter. This is a good thing in one way - instead of checking Facebook or browsing Amazon (both of which take forever to load), I can update my blog so that we are not so disconnected. I won't be in this position forever, but until E is able to find a full-time, permanent position and brings home enough paychecks to set him at even for saving, I'm here. I look forward to talking to you every Sunday. It could be like fellowship hour, minus the cookies and weak, decaffeinated coffee.
Lately it's been - ugh. I've been running around all day for work, so when I get home, the last thing I want to do is be productive. Honestly, I haven't even called my mother in like, a week. That's huge since I used to talk to her at LEAST every other day.
What's new, you ask? Well, how about everything?
I moved on July 1st. My boyfriend, the love of my life, moved from Michigan to NYC to be with me and not only did the distance end... the horrible 800 miles that separated us for over a year... but we did something crazy: we decided to live together. (I'll blog about that at another time).
I started a second job. It's a part-time position within Project Hospitality (the agency for which I already hold a position) working in a shelter. Every Saturday and Sunday, I somehow manage to pull myself out of bed at 6a in order to clock in at 7a for an 8 hour shift of site babysitting and story-making. It's not a bad job (actually, it's really simple), but it helps to pay some bills until E finds himself a job.
Tinka is here. I forgot what it's like to try to roll over in bed with a cat on my feet. Or to wear my favorite black shirt or skirt or pants or dress with cat hair decorations. Or to walk to the kitchen for a glass of water and step in puke. I also forgot how nice it was just to lay on the couch with her watching TV on my lap with me... or the feeling of coming home to someone if no human is home.
We have a bathtub, a real kitchen with counters, a living room with windows and a bedroom with two closets. We pretty much live in a palace. Pad status = increased 10 fold. Windows - these are probably my favorite parts of the new place. They lead to fresh air, to breezes, to smells of summer... they are where I most often find Tinka perched and from where I can watch the people of our block like a creeper. So good.
E is unemployed. This. This has been the hardest part of all of this. We, hopefully, will be so much happier and healthier when this phase of our relationship is over. We're not really in a horrible place, there's just much depression, much anger, much stress, much worry, much negativity surrounding it. I cannot wait for this period of waiting and hoping to be fruitful. God is providing and God will provide, but there have definitely been moments where I wondered if we hadn't made the wrong decisions in all of this because there has been little blessing on that front. (again, I'll blog about this at another time, I think).
However, despite all the news and things that kept me away, I'm back. Every Sunday at the shelter, I work the downstairs office, which is composed of a camera monitor system, a phone and a computer from 1782 that runs slower than molasses in winter. This is a good thing in one way - instead of checking Facebook or browsing Amazon (both of which take forever to load), I can update my blog so that we are not so disconnected. I won't be in this position forever, but until E is able to find a full-time, permanent position and brings home enough paychecks to set him at even for saving, I'm here. I look forward to talking to you every Sunday. It could be like fellowship hour, minus the cookies and weak, decaffeinated coffee.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)