Dear family and friends,
i need your prayers RIGHT NOW.
Over the past week, I have not been at peace with leaving at all.
I even dialed the phone to tell the RCA to withdraw my participation and send back all the funds raised.

I know that God loves CHAOS even more than I do.
I know that God wants me to trust and believe in Him... and in Him alone.
I know that there is a plan and God will be working in CHAOS and Home Acres while I am away.
I know that there are people who will be keeping a close eye on the program and making sure that everything goes smoothly.

HOWEVER, i haven't been able to complete let go of this. I know that God is bigger than anything I can fathom. I know, I know, I know... but it's so hard to just let go.

please pray that God brings me to peace.
please pray that I give this up and let it go.
please pray that love stands strong.
please pray for the kids that are going to be my transition team.

fortune cookies, flights and funds

so, my fortune cookie said: "the best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others."
wow.



in other news, I booked my flights home for my brother's wedding -

Thursday, October 8th, 2009 -
Depart: 6:25am Budapest, Hungary (2hr 0min later...)
Arrive: 8:25am Brussels, Belgium
Change planes. Time between flights: 1hr 20min

Depart: 9:45am Brussels, Belgium (8hr 15min later...)
Arrive: 12:00pm Newark, NJ
Change planes. Time between flights: 2hr 55min

Depart: 2:55pm Newark, NJ (2hr 5min later...)
Arrive: 5:00pm Grand Rapids, MI

i am excited about getting here on Thursday at 5p because I will need to go dress shopping... and it will give me time to reconnect with my family and friends...
Friday will be hanging out with friends in the morning/afternoon... then rehearsal dinner in the evening.
Saturday will be the wedding, of course.
Sunday is church and youth group at Home Acres
Monday is chill with friends/family until I leave for the airport...

Depart: 6:30pm Grand Rapids, MI (2hr 5min later)
Arrive: 8:35pm Newark, NJ
Change planes. Time between flights: 0hr 50min

Depart: 9:25pm Newark, NJ (7hr 40min later)
Arrive: 11:05am Paris, France
Change planes. Time between flights: 4hr 40min
(4 hours 40 mins!!! i might just go into the city and have lunch :D)

Depart: 3:45pm Paris, France (2hr 10min later)
Arrive: 5:55pm Budapest, Hungary



$876 later... I'm broke.
that's 90% of my savings since Jan. 1, 2009.
yay for spending $1000 on a wedding that isn't even my own!
but, i love my brother and Nikki and wouldn't miss this for the world.



I have approximately $7000 committed so far, with about $500 that's been pledged but not given.
that's $5,500 short of my goal.
Still, though, i'm over half-way there.
i'm on my knees and I'm praying that you will all join me there.
it involves lots of prayer and joy and sadness and worry and fear and trust...
that's where I am.

Anti-Roma Crusade?

this is just sad: Anti-Roma Crusade?

i heard this song at work this morning and it just rocked my socks. it pretty much runs through of all of the emotions i'm feeling spiritually right now, including what i am currently crying out in prayer each day.
i can't believe that in 3 short months, I will be gone and everything will be changed... as i rode home with Kevin yesterday from a church gathering, I realized that I will truly miss him and my family here... i'll miss those peaceful moments in his car, I'll miss the pure joy that came from playing badminton with youth, i'll miss the great conversations of people that have grown to love and accept me as their sister... i'll miss them sooo much. how can i srsly just walk away from that? Only God could lead me to do something so crazy...



You don't want my perfection,
All you ask of me is that I show up broken at your feet.
You don't want my religion,
You are looking for devotion that is more than just routine.

So show me what it means...
To take up my cross and count it all as loss,
All for the sake of knowing you.
To love my enemies and care for those in need.
Show me what it means to follow you.

Have I become like the Pharisee,
Passing by the needy while I'm speaking Jesus on my lips.
Will I walk with you on raging seas,
Will I turn away when you want more than what I want to give.

So show me what it means...
...What it means...
To take up my cross and count it all as loss,
All for the sake of knowing you.
To love my enemies and care for those in need.
Show me what it means to follow you.

To love as you love,
And live as you lived,
To never give up on giving you my life.

To love as you love,
And live as you lived.
To find out what it means to be alive.
To be alive!

To take up my cross and count it all as loss,
All for the sake of knowing you.

To love my enemies and care for those in need,
Show me what it means to follow you.

I will follow you, I will follow you.



Meredith Andrews - "Show Me What it Means"

for kicks...

$1,519

praise God for the benefit concert -
surrounded by great family and friends
enjoyed hot dogs, side dishes, lemonade, and ice cream galore! (thanks so much to all who contributed to our massive food line!!!)
beautiful music by Nikki Simmons, Mr. Flowers and Brenden Stark (you guys rock - thank you sooo much!)
and so much love and support that I seriously don't know how I'm going to move away from all of you.

the total raised in one night?

$1,519



Praise God from Whom all blessings flow!

Benefit Dinner and Concert

June 14th
6:30p
Free Will Donation

Featuring Brenden Stark

@ Home Acres Church
21 Murray St. SE
Kentwood, MI 49508